by Bree Wernicke

Help! Possible curse??

Hi! Not sure this forum is the right place to post this, but bear with me. So about a week ago I came down with horrible stomach cramps. I assumed it was something I ate (I’m lactose intolerant) so I ignored it, but then after a few hours I felt something coming up and sort of burped/coughed/barfed a Lego piece into the sink. One of those 2x3 gray blocks, pretty standard I think? I’m not a Lego expert. At the time I didn’t think a whole lot of it—my kids leave their toys freaking everywhere so why not my stomach too, right? But a couple hours later I horked up another Lego, and ever since then, they’ve just increased in frequency. I’ve spat out 3 since I started typing this. Now I have about a dozen buckets full of Lego pieces, all colors, lots of textures, big and small, some highly specific (street signs??), basically a huge variety. And YES I dunk them in Clorox before storing them.

Apart from the cramps (which went away), this doesn’t hurt, I have no nausea, and I don’t have that grimy staticky feeling you get with a typical curse. My PCP said it would probably stop on its own and to go to urgent care if I feel the grimy staticky feeling or if I start coughing up blood. But other than acquiring bucketfuls of Legos I feel fine! It doesn’t seem to be contagious—my kids and wife are unaffected. It mostly prevents me from going out in public, because I don’t want to be that lady barfing up Legos in the grocery store (it’s rude and unsettling). It also prevents me from sleeping, since if I fall asleep I get absolute TORRENTS of them once I wake up. It took me a solid half hour to cough up the backlog this morning (I only slept 5 hours).

And then this morning I coughed up a folded piece of paper which is pretty wet and gross but seems to be a set of instructions to build something. Should I try to follow them? I’m tempted to, because I’ve never seriously played with Legos and it seems fun. However, if this is a curse then obviously I want to avoid becoming enthralled to some kind of dark Lego magician.

Has anyone ever encountered a curse like this, and if so, what did you do? My insurance only covers cursebreakers for a few specific curses, and I’m trying to avoid paying out of pocket (I’m in the US). Thanks for any advice in advance.

Help! Possible curse?? (UPDATE)

Hi all, thanks for the advice and comments on my last post. I’m grateful to the majority of you for remaining civil. Once again, I’m American, I cannot just “go to the cursebreaker” like all you Europeans. So I had to try a few home remedies.

I’ve tried nettle, mugwort, a salt circle, a Reiki healing session off YouTube, and that thing where you sing until your voice gives out (it is surprisingly hard to sing around Legos). Nothing I tried had any effect, though! And I know everyone said following the instructions sheet was a terrible idea but … I can’t leave the house, so I was bored, okay? Spoiler: nothing bad happened.

The instructions were all pictures, no words, so I could just extrapolate the parts that were too stained to make out. And my dumb ass didn’t sort the pieces before they went into the buckets so I had to spend a lot of time sorting Legos (and the kids would NOT help, they think it’s gross that they ever touched “throw-up”). But I got into it eventually, and at the end I wound up building a flat stretch of road, two lanes, gray with some yellow divider lines. Honestly it’s so boring I’m not going to bother uploading a photo, everyone knows what a road looks like.

So I had no idea what to do with this thing, but then I horked up another set of instructions. This one’s thicker and looks more involved, and I think it’s turning out to be a little green house! Super cottagecore, kind of like our neighbors’ house. When it’s done I’m going to connect it to the road. It makes me wonder what it’d be like to be a little Lego person living in a little Lego world. It all looks so tidy! It’s nice to have a hobby, too, for once in my life.

Anyway, I’m still not in discomfort or pain or anything, and I don’t have the grimy staticky curse feeling, so I’ve decided this Lego barfing thing will probably just go away on its own. I don’t really think it’s a curse anymore—my wife has been researching the local ley lines and thinks it might be some kind of weirdness based on hormonal changes interacting with the nearest juncture (pretty major energy amplifier, apparently) which will settle down eventually. Even if it is a curse, still better than the last one I got. I caught Floridian thaumadermititis at Disney World last year, 0/10 do not recommend. Thanks for the advice everyone! Stay uncursed.

Rate my builds!

Hi Lego community! I’m a pretty new builder, fell into this hobby by total accident recently. Here are my 3 most recent projects, all inspired by places nearby to me. Sorry about the visual artifacts showing up in some of the photos—there’s something funky going on with our local ley lines. Just ignore it! No curses, everyone is fine.

Build #1: Yoga studio. For this I used an instruction booklet (sorry, I don’t know where it’s from!) and it came out nearly identical to the local one I used to go to! Really happy with it.

Build #2: Trader Joe’s! This is modeled after my local grocery store. I started off using some instructions but pretty early on I just got super into the flow of it and tossed the instructions. Trust your intuition, it pays off! Particularly proud of the freezer aisle. All the shoppers inside are based off people I know, which is a fun little tidbit just for me!

Build #3: Major 3-way intersection with terrible traffic. This one just sort of came to me and I barely remember how I built it I was so in the zone!!

Building really is becoming kind of an art for me, I’m a little obsessed! I burp up Lego pieces (harmless temporary thing, not a curse) and build based on a really clear picture in my mind and it turns out eerily similar to the real places. Constructive critique welcome, but I don’t think any of this could actually be closer to life itself!

Yoga studio closure?

What happened to San Reno Yoga (the one on Wyoming Blvd. with the rainbow statue out front)? I was last there about a month ago and it seemed to be doing really well, the morning meditation class was super crowded. I wanted to buy my wife some classes today but the website is gone, and it seems to have been taken off maps too. Does anyone know why it closed so suddenly?

EDIT: I’m literally just asking a genuine question, there is no reason for everyone to suddenly play some weird practical joke on me. Mods please lock this post, this is ridiculous.

Wife gaslighting me?? Help!

I (35F) and my wife (37F) typically shop at Trader Joe’s. Recently I noticed she got groceries at a different store the last couple of times. I asked her why she hadn’t gone to Trader Joe’s like we always do and she insisted we’d always gone to Aldi. We got into an argument about it and finally went back through our transactions for the past like, two years, and … no Trader Joe’s. All Aldi. I pulled up a map to show her that the Trader Joe’s was way closer to us but the Trader Joe’s is completely gone. I checked 3 different maps and the store just isn’t there. Okay, so maybe it just closed suddenly? But the bizarre thing is, some of the streets were different. There’s a huge intersection near our house that is a pain in the ass to navigate, and it’s not on any maps. All the streets still connect, but without that intersection if that makes sense? This is really distressing and I don’t know what to think. We recently hired a cursebreaker at huge expense (America!!) and he found zero curses, either active or dormant, on either of us or in the immediate area.

My wife said maybe I’m remembering things wrong because I haven’t left the house recently. I have a temporary harmless medical condition that makes traveling even short distances inconvenient. I thought it was really unfair of her to go there, but then out of nowhere she attacked my hobby too! She told me to stop doing it so much, that it was taking over my life and straining our relationship and scaring our kids (7F, 5NB). I fully broke down. This hobby is the main source of purpose and meaning in my life at this time (due to my medical condition) and I don’t think it’s fair of her to want me to stop doing what brings me joy. Am I being unreasonable about this considering she is gaslighting me about a grocery store??

EDIT: My hobby is Legos. I build tiny replicas of nearby places. And I only build places that actually exist—I built our Trader Joe’s, which I couldn’t have done if it didn’t exist??

EDIT 2: Checking our carbon monoxide detectors. Thanks all.

How to stop doing something you really want to do?

Does anyone else get super into stuff, like a hobby or pastime, to the extent that you can’t stop yourself from doing it even though you know you should? And not in a way where you genuinely want to stop and can’t, like an addiction, in a way where like, you want to do it forever and you could do it forever but sometimes you have to take a shower or cook or something. Like an addiction to something harmless and good and really, really fun and creative. Like those obsessive artists who hide in their studios and don’t sleep for a week and come out with a bunch of brilliant masterpieces. Like you don’t want to stop, but you want to want to stop, but you just don’t. People around me want me to stop and I want to want to stop for them but I just don’t.

Anyone relate?

MASSIVE LEGO TOWN BUILD!!

Hi! I hope you guys enjoy this roundup of my biggest project to date (click through for album!). I’ve spent thousands upon thousands of hours on this town build, a replica of San Reno, California. I’m really proud of the level of detail I achieved here. When I look at it and let my eyes unfocus, it just completely comes to life. I can see the leaves on the trees waving and the cars moving down the streets and the people going in and out of the library and post office. Only one lot is still empty—that’s for my house, which I’m still working on. Let me know what you think!

EDIT: No, none of this is Photoshopped, and that is NOT the Eternal Void outside my windows. Y’all are creepy, zooming in on irrelevant background details! The visual artifacts are a result of local ley line weirdness and I took the photos at night so it’s dark. Take your concern elsewhere. I am not cursed!!!

Am I a god now?

This is going to sound weird, but bear with me. A couple months ago I started building with Legos as a hobby. My builds are pretty realistic. I built stuff around my town (houses, stores, schools, roads) until I had a replica of the entire town, except for my house, which I am still working on. However, I think everything I built disappeared in real life. I haven’t left the house, so I cannot check. When I built our grocery store, my wife started shopping at another one and claimed we always had. When I built the elementary school, she started homeschooling our 2 kids, again claiming this had always been the plan.

I think I am the only real person left who remembers the town. If you search “San Reno” nothing comes up anymore except posts I’ve made. All the people are gone. Outside my house is just the Eternal Void. Inside it’s silent. I wanted more quiet time for building so I placed my family in the park, and that was a while ago. I haven’t seen them in real life since.

The Lego town takes up most of the first floor. It’s alive, just like a real town. It goes through daily rhythms. Traffic and pedestrians and lights turning on in the houses in the evenings. Right now I can see my kid’s kindergarten class at recess, and my wife is coming out of the store. She always buys me the greenest bananas, but I don’t see any in her cart.

I don’t know how long I’ve spent watching the town. I haven’t slept or ate in a really long time. I don’t need to, I think. I am not hungry or thirsty or sleepy, so I don’t think I can be lonely either. I’m just transfixed watching my little world. I feel like I should be worried about this, but I’m not. I don’t know if I can feel anything anymore. I know I should get around to building the next town over and expanding the world but all I can do is sit here and watch.

I have a head, torso, and legs picked out for my own figurine but I haven’t put them together yet. I don’t know what will happen if I put myself in. Will I cease to exist, or will I join my family? Do they miss me?

Do they even remember I exist?

I am not looking for advice, really. I know I have to do something. I keep staring at the pieces in my hand, and hoping I’m brave enough to do it.

If anyone’s still here, thanks for reading. Wish me luck.